Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
