ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
