I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
