the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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