Someone shit on the floor
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize