Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
