official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I know her cup size but not her name....
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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