two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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