Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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