I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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