found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
