and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
