Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Randomize
