Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize