things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Randomize
