so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
