Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
