My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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