the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
