dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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