If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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