try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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