Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
