We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
