i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
