the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
