Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
