So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
