you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
