nut hugger
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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