At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
