Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
