are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
