Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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