Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize