Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
