Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
