thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
