"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Randomize