she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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