Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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