I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
