She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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