tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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