we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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