Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Can you repeat that, but with context?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
