im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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