buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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