I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Drunk is a universal language darling
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