the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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