theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Randomize
